Watermelon Patch

Did anyone else grow up with the poisoned watermelon patch metaphor for the Bible?

Imagine a watermelon patch with 66 pumpkins. One night, an enemy comes in and injects one of the watermelons with deadly poison. He posts a sign that says, "One of the watermelons, but I won't tell you which one."

Because you don't know which watermelon is poisoned, you're forced to throw the entire patch away. If just one is poisoned, then the whole patch might as well be poisoned.

Therefore, if just one iota of Scripture is inaccurate, you might as well throw the entire thing out.

Therefore that's why it's important to defend every single verse of Scripture from attacks from "godless liberals" who would say that Scripture was inaccurate about 6-day creation, the historical exodus, miracles, etc.

The logical problems with this metaphor are legion. But I also think it helps explain the baby-out-with-the-bath-water phenomenon that some deconstructing folks feel forced into with their theology.

Imagine a kid doing this to their parents. "Mom, Dad, I discovered the Tooth Fairy isn't real. From now on, I can't believe anything else you say." So of course so many evangelical Christians feel like they have no choice but to eject their entire faith.